If Not Together, How? by Rabbi Sandra Kviat

If not together, how?
Adrienne Rich

I love this quote, which seems to be a riff or commentary on the well known Hillel quote, ‘If not for myself…’ for it sums up the existential question of what does it mean to live in a society, in a community, with others? And what would we be without others? How would we function? 

For 11 years we have grown our community, from an idea to a vibrant group where people find belonging, children learn about their traditions, history and grow their Jewish identities, adults discover new parts of their identity, where we celebrate all the milestones in a Jewish life. For 11 years we have built and created and grown new structures and experiences. We are now at a size where we can do many more things, and cater for many needs. This is a blessing but also a challenge. How do we keep the feeling of closeness and connection to each other? How do we continue to be a grassroots community where everyone takes turns to help out, and make the community flourish? How can we continue to support each other in our community?

When we started out, we were a group of innovators and disruptors. The structure of our community, and how we are fully inclusive of non-Jewish partners, in rituals as well as on committee, is still an innovation/disruption to how many communities function. Our commitment to being a ‘post building community’ which means that our focus is on people rather than place, is another disruption. Our way of organising ourselves is less about ‘what has always been done/what a Jewish community should be doing’ and instead guided by the principles of what we need and want as a community. 

This is of course one way to remind you that we are calling round our members in the next four-five months to see where you are at, what you value in our community, what issues might stand in the way of you participating. Please share your thoughts, questions and issues as this knowledge is how we continue to be able to be a community that reflects our members. Don’t be alarmed to see a number you might not know on your phone, and please reply/return any texts or phone calls from a member who is calling you.

It is also a way of making you think about how you will participate in the community this year? What will your role be? How will you help the community grow? We are looking for new innovators for the committee, to help grow how we can look after each other. We are also looking for people to help innovate and update a festival like Purim (last year we had an improv group), or Shavuot (blind cheese tasting was a fantastic experience), or perhaps help run a ‘sleeping in the sukkah’ experience for the older children?  Sharing your voice, and your experiences at a Friday night Shabbat, or being in services on a Saturday morning, helping others to say kaddish, are also ways of helping the community. 

Whether you can help as a one off, host a Friday night, just be present in a service, or want to be part of a group that organises, we grow and flourish with your help.

It is not a coincidence that the theme of this year's Mental Health Awareness Shabbat is community. As we begin to read the ultimate ageless story of how to create and sustain a community in the Book of Exodus this Shabbat, we are asked to think about how we support one another in our community? 

For if not together, how?